I seem to have fallen off the diabetes management wagon. Hard. I feel left behind, abandoned by all the familiar habits I worked hard to adhere to just a year or so ago. My A1c’s been creeping up little by little, and I’m scared to see what the next one will be. That d-wagon is way out on the horizon, disappearing from sight, and I’m trying to muster up the energy to stand up and start chasing it.
It’s not that I’ve stopped taking insulin or testing my blood sugar or wearing my CGM — I’m doing all of those things. The difference is that, even though I’m going through the motions, I’m not really thinking about what I’m doing. I’m trying to make it up as I go along, and it’s not working.
Part of the problem is that I’m not counting carbohydrates. I mean, I know that there are 19 grams of carbohydrates in my trusty little cup of Chobani, and that a Kashi bar has 18 grams. But I’m eating all kinds of random stuff these days (a lot of it from restaurants), and even if I do my darnedest to estimate how many carbohydrates are in a medium-sized blob of chicken pad thai, I’m likely to be way off. And that shows on my CGM.
So this morning, I decided that I was going to go all week without SWAG bolusing a single time, just to see what happens. Yes, friends, I pledge to accurately count every single carbohydrate that enters my body — at least through the weekend.
I’m only four hours into my self-imposed challenge, and I’m already getting anxious. Anything I might eat for lunch or dinner today (or tomorrow, or the next day) is going to require research, weighing, reading, measuring and figuring. Of course, the easiest way to get around all of this is to eat packaged food exclusively, but that’s not fun, or particularly healthy.
I’m thinking that my first step is to find a reliable source for carbohydrate counts. I have a dusty old version of the ADA’s Fat and Carbohydrate Content, but I get frustrated trying to find things. Then there’s this thing called the Internet, but I’m not sure where to go to find the most accurate and reliable numbers. I’m eager to use my iPhone, too, but I’m not sure which app to start using.
You can be sure I’ll post the results of my little experiment on here. At the very least, I’m hoping to feel a little less guilty, and that I’ll be a few steps closer to that stupid runaway wagon.